how i came to realize that i'm an idiot:
saturday morning, 8:10am
j: nice shot dude! you're nuttin' that club today.
me: yeah, not bad. fuck, it's hot already? it's not even 9am yet.
j2: it's gonna get hotter. good thing we have carts and good thing i'm mexican....i'm used to this shit.
j: you should try going to vietnam in the summer. talk about fucking hot.
me: why the hell would i go there in the summer? that's just gluttony. and you both suck for not being white. buy me a drink.
(after 5 holes...)
me: look at my fucking hat. it's drenched already and it's hotter than a slave ship out here!
j: must suck to be white sometimes.
me: yeah, good thing i brought.....oh FUCK!
j2: you forgot your sunscreen didn't you?
me: yeah.
j2: how long have you lived out here?
me: almost 3 years.
j2: almost 3 years and you still manage to forget sunscreen? idiot. you're gonna fry.
me: probably.
j: that sucks for you, dude. lemme see. (sees my red neck) holy shit, man, you're gonna be in pain for a while.
me: that bad?
j: no, i always say "holy shit" when something isn't that bad. i'd recommend not showering the rest of the weekend. you're like fire-engine red and a shower is gonna hurt like a mofo!
me: sweet. this happens every summer out here. it's like my memory is reset over the winter and i always manage to get torched at the beginning of the summer.
j +j2: stupid white boy idiot mother fucker. (smack me simultaneously on the back of the neck.
me: (sigh).
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3 comments:
i got some pretty good color this weekend. something in the colorado sun actually allows me to tan a bit. it's kinda nice!
Except for the whole having cancer part. What the hell is wrong with you? I'm Hispanic and I still slather on sunscreen EVERY SINGLE DAY.
I refuse to wrinkle. Ever.
I'm going for the 'Dylan McKay forehead' look... it helps me seem sincere. Sunscreen be damned.
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